(O8/JUL/2014)
- Sri Mayapur, India
Today morning I saw every gate was
locked and few devotees were standing to get to the lotus roof top to take Guru
Maharaj's darshan. But Maha Varaha Pr was explaining them that, "Guru
Maharaj is taking rest. And he need some rest; so we can't allow." Then at
last, devotees left with disappointment. But there is no other go.
I also went little late to Guru
Maharaj's room. He took shower and he was sitting ready to take his break fast.
Maha Varaha Pr checked his body temperature it was 38.2; slight fever. Morning
Deva Gauranga Pr gave sponge bath to Guru Maharaj. And I got the opportunity to
serve him breakfast. But during his "asusta-lila" - this term used
here in Bengal. They say it as "sick-lila". So during this
asusta-lila it is very difficult to serve him. I gave him daliya Kitchadi;
since Guru Maharaj's stomach upset; he said, "Daliya is much harder to
digest than rice." Then he took only 5 to 6 spoons and he said, "I
can't eat? I need butter milk." Then Deva Gauranga Pr made butter milk and
got it. Guru Maharaj accepted that two cups and completed his breakfast. We
didn't force him in anyway.
Then we asked to lay down and take
rest. But he said, "For sometime let me sit and then I will take
rest." Then he was silent for sometime and he didn't speak for five to ten
mins. I asked him, "Shall play some Prabhupada's lecture?" He said,
"First let me chant my rounds." Then I also joined hin with chanting
sitting near his lotus feet. Then after two rounds. Guru Maharaj said,
"Read the answers." Then I started to read out all the answers from
jpssecrets@Gmail.com. Guru Maharaj listening to the whole mail. Some have
copy pasted the whole lila. He asked me to read every word from My dear Guru
Maharaj till Your servant and their name. He was just relishing the pastime by hearing
again and again. 50% answers were wrong. He also enjoyed that.
Then again his stomach upset; and went
to toilet. Meanwhile, I went to collect a vinyl print from Rasa Priya Gopika
devi dasi from Quality Assurance department. As I was talking to Vidvan Gauranga
Prabhu in Kolkata, I mentioned to him about Guru Maharaj's tiredness. And Guru
Maharaj is not listening to anybody. He is just travelling and preaching and
not caring for his health. "Only if Srila Prabhupada say, he will
listen." Immediately he remembered and said, "yes! There is a quote
in a letter by Srila Prabhupada to Guru Maharaj and I will send you. You make a
print and put it in Guru maharaj's room." Then he send me the quote. When
I reached Mayapur, I just forgotten that quote. But when I saw Guru
Maharaj's health down. I just made one simple poster with that quote and
asked Vraja Krishna Pr to print it by yesterday night and get it by morning.
But, it is all happened in Bengal; I considered that as a means miraculous
start. Then today, I went to collect it from their office. I got it and came to
roof; Guru Maharaj Was Just Going To Take Rest. And then, we just matched with
the previous painting, and replaced it painting and hang it on the wall. And I
left to Archives...
Then, I came back to Lotus roof. With
so much anxiety. Guru Maharaj would have blasted for putting this quote
inside his room; without his permission. But, it all happened with Maha Varaha
Pr's support; so if anything happened, I have some backup. When I entered Guru Maharaj
was taking his lunch. Acintya Caitanya Prabhu was there, he said, I read
this quote to Guru Maharaj. I asked, "Any answer or reaction for this
quote?" He said, NO!!! Then I didn't say anything. Panchajaya Keshava Pr
was feeding and he gave me that service and went to make one phone call; which
Guru maharaj asked to do. Then, again after some time he came and I went to
take lunch. Guru Maharaj was fresh. And after that I just put up the TOVP
latest video production for 7 mins. And Guru Maharaj was watching it.
Then Maha Varaha pr came and he was
taking some measurement for the new wheel chair. So Guru Maharaj said,
"You can take a picture with my present while chair. So that the
manufactures, who are in Taiwan can see my need." After sitting on the wheel
chair; he just gave a pose holding his two hands on. Then I said, "Guru
Maharaj, I also want to take one snap, please be there in that pose." He
did it. I took the picture with Srila Prabhupada's quote on back ground. And
said that to Guru Maharaj, Immediately he just made his head down, and everyone
started to laugh. Then I turned the chair and showed him the quote by taking it
from the wall. And he read it by himself.
"...I think that you are working
too hard. Your illness is the result of too hard work. Remain in Mayapur. Take
rest as much as necessary. And work through your assistants. And chant Hare
Krsna. (Letter from Srila Prabhupada to Jayapataka Swami, 4 Dec 1976) Then he
went to take rest.
Evening again I came back to see Guru
Maharaj; but there was lot of devotees serving. So I thought let me chant
my rounds. And I was doing my chanting other side of his roof. That time, I
missed Guru Maharaj. He went to temple to take darshan. Whatever it may
be, he will go and take darshan. I was telling to me that, I should not miss
any darshan of deities here after. Then Guru Maharaj came back and devotees
arranged for dinner. Guru Maharaj was not happy with prasadam; he said, "I
am not feeling good taste." Due to his illness. Then I just playing Srila
Prabhupada lecture; I thought he will get out of this sick during
lecture." Then after some time I stopped playing as Guru Maharaj was not
eating and not saying any word. I asked him, "if yo don't want to take
this, what else you want?" He kept his silence; then I started to say,
shall we bring this, shall we bring that... then he showed his sign. Then we
brought some puffed wheat. Then he accepted it. Then he did his Gayathri.
And met 43 DamodaraDesh devotees headed by Srivallabha pr. And Guru Maharaj met
them, and he individually introduced the family members and their seva and all
the details. It suppose to be two min darshan I thought, but it went for more
than 40 mins. Guru Maharaj was totally tired but he was blessing devotees with
Jagannath Stick. Then Srivallabha pr described about their Bangladesh Yatra and
he said, "just we are realising, you unrevealed glories. How much
you have done for Gaudiya sampradaya. Every where in Bangladesh we heard your
glories..." And he went on and on.
Then Guru Maharaj came back to his room
and he took some more dinner as he felt hunger. And I was feeding him. He ate
good. That is a good sign, I felt. Finally, the fever. Is coming down
37.2. Guru Maharaj said, "it is not fever! It is slight
fever."
In the evening doctor from Bhakti
vedanta clinic came and said, "it is due to tiredness and travel and
mainly due to change of climate." So prescribed what are the things we
should give and not to give. He banned milk and products; because Guru Maharaj
coughing. Then after dinner; Guru Maharaj was brushing and after that he
showed, "Bhadra Balarama Prabhu to look at this poster; and he very
much supported that, "Guru Maharaj should stay back as Srila Prabhupada
clearly mentioned here.
Then finally we made Guru maharaj
ready to go to bed. While he was moving, he murmured; "REMAIN IN
MAYAPUR" Then we asked what Guru Maharaj, he said, "I am
thinking about it". I was happy to hear. Guru Maharaj finally at least
said this word. He will think about it.
Guru Maharaj just travelling to meet
his disciples all around the world. Now, if all the disciples come and meet
Guru Maharaj here in Mayapur. Then Guru Maharaj no need to travel
anywhere. It was my humble thinking and dreaming that if it happen; it will be
great. Other than this external reasons. Another one reason Vidvan Gauranga
Prabhu said to me, "after giving initiation Guru Maharaj's health will get
disturbed for few days, just it digesting all the karma." Yes! That is
true. New disciples and existing worst disciples like me. Giving so much of
karma to Guru Maharaj. And regarding GURU Maharaj's health there were lot false
news went out. But, it is slightest fever. And tiredness only. So all the
devotees have to do is... chant for him and pray for him. Even if there is no
fever for him. Some devotees are deducting their extra rounds from the day GURU
Maharaj got stroke in 2008.
I don't know when will I do; I am also
thinking at least to chant one round etc, for Guru Maharaj through out my life.
Hopefully; almighty Lord will help me to do this humble offering.
-(Shyama Rasika Dasa - Personal Diary)
